/RELATIONSHIP ALCHEMY
You feel angry. Hurt. Disappointed. Tired. Your partner is shut down, or fighting back, or both.
You don't know how you got here, and you don't know how to make it better.
You can't talk without it blowing up. You can't be silent without it building. The quality time is all but non-existent. The intimacy has evaporated. The dreams you used to dream together feel like something from another life.
This is where Relationship Alchemy begins.
Who I work with
Couples in real trouble.
Couples who have been circling the same argument for years. Couples recovering from infidelity, breakdown, explosive fights, slow erosion. Couples unsure whether to stay or go — and needing clarity, not chaos.
Couples reluctant to do "couples therapy" — who recognise that men's and women's nervous systems process differently, that talking alone won't do it, and that the work has to be as much about being and doing as it is about saying.
Couples who want to reignite the intimacy and passion they once had.
Couples ready to close the chapter with grace.
This space is for alchemy, true transformation. Not repetition.
What we do together
We work at the emotional, the practical and the energetic — no fluff, no blame, no refereeing. I am not here to decide who's right.
We look at the invisible patterns running underneath the surface — the power dynamics, the unmet needs, the templates imported from earlier lives that you didn't know you signed up for.
We rebuild communication that clears the air rather than clouds it — drawing on Gottman research and decades of practice with high-stakes conversations.
We map your individual emotional blueprints — and how they collide, ignite or shut down when they meet.
We attend to passion and polarity — the energetic dance most relationships forget about, and most couples can revive faster than they think.
And if the work is closure, we do that too. Lovingly. Cleanly. So you both walk out of the relationship more whole than you walked in.
Why this work, why me
I draw from transformational coaching, the Gottman method, relationship systems coaching, trauma-informed practice, modern relationship psychology, Tantra, and the kind of men's-shed wisdom that doesn't show up in textbooks.
I grew up inside an abusive household. I had my own failed first marriage. Then I built the partnership I'm in now — fifteen years with my husband Nav, and counting. My professional training is broad and serious. The reason this work moves is that I know the terrain from the inside.
Why you won't find testimonials
Because this is the most private work I do. People come to me to talk about what they cannot talk about anywhere else — infidelity, addiction, violence, the conversations they have not yet dared to have inside their own minds. Confidentiality isn't a policy here. It is the whole container. Nobody knows we are doing this work together unless you choose to tell them.
This is the turning point
You can keep having the same argument - or:
You can build something different — together, or, if it's time, apart.
Either way, your relationship can become a source of clarity, strength, and yes — love.
This is the work of alchemy.
Transcend Limits. Defy Convention. Spark magic
FAQs
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Lighter than you'd think. You'll probably cry. You'll probably laugh. Heavy problems don't have to feel heavy in our sessions — that's part of the work.
We'll contract upfront on the kind of coaching container that suits you. Some couples want strong challenge and bounce. Others want gentler holding. We'll find the shape.
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I draw on:
The Gottman Sound Relationship House — the foundations of a strong partnership, your love and argument languages, interpersonal power dynamics, and better patterns of communication.
Relationship Systems Coaching (ORSC) — breaking through to deeper understanding, friendship and shared vision.
A Buddhist definition of love — closer to the truth than the Hollywood mix of attachment plus hormones (see the blog).
Tantra — getting out of your head and back into your body, leaning into sensation, rebalancing masculine and feminine within and between you, and, if you seek it, rekindling passion and intimacy.
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Privacy first, so no names. But:
Couples whose arguments had become violent, finding constructive ways to be in conflict.
Couples recovering after one or both partners had cheated — often more deeply connected than before the affair.
Couples consciously uncoupling and co-parenting well, both walking out of the relationship freer than they walked in.
Long-term couples who had quietly drifted, finding themselves and each other again.
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I'm biased — for healthy relationship. Healthy means whatever is a healthy co-creation for the two of you.
I've witnessed violence and toxicity in equal measure across genders, and I don't discriminate. We all behave badly when we are at the limits of what we can hold.
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Book a free call. We'll talk through your situation, what you'd like to achieve, and whether we're a fit. No drama if it's not.
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Relationships are co-created. Working on yourself is the greatest gift you can give the partnership — and it alone will shift things.
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We start with a 3 month series - you choose the cadence - weekly or fortnightly.
If you're coaching as a couple, we will do at least one one to one session as well as working as a couple.
We can arrange this however suits you — including stacking sessions into a face-to-face workshop with follow-ups.
If you want to keep going, you can do another series or pay-as-you-go.
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Lived experience, then training.
The abusive household I grew up in. The failed first marriage I survived. The now nearly twenty-year partnership I built afterwards with Nav.
I used to be a stonewaller — avoidant, bottling, wishing I was a robot who didn't have to feel any of it. That was a long time ago. After much therapy and the study of Gestalt and Transactional Analysis, I trained in:
The Gottman Method (the Gottman Institute, who have led the field for more than 50 years)
Relationship Systems Coaching with ORSC and CRR Global
Human Potential Professional Coach Training, ICF certified
I also continue to study Tantra, energy and sound work, music and movement.
These practices help us strip back the dust of domesticity that hardens into a shell over the heart.
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2 x one-to-ones (if coaching as a couple)
The Gottman Method Relationship Check-Up
Couples coaching sessions, via Zoom or in person in London
Between-session WhatsApp support
A curated library of resources via GoogleDrive or WhatsApp
Your commitment: coaching time, plus the willingness to put the work into practice between sessions
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Same action, same outcome.
Different action, different outcome.
The math doesn't change. Do different, live different.